Jane
by fanoflost
Summary: Garrus was there for her, through the thick and thin, always listening, never judging. -- Garrus/FemShep. Spoilers for ME1 and 2. One-shot.


Disclaimer: Bioware owns everything you recognize. Also, Death Cab for Cutie owns the line, "I suppose you were a truth I would rather lose, than to have never lain beside at all." from their song 'What Sarah Said'.

**Jane**

She was Commander Jane Shepard of the SSV Normandy. She was also one of the most well-known people in Citadel Space. She knew exactly what to in every situation, what to say to every person, and how to react to life without batting an eyelash.

However, at this very moment in time, Shepard did not even remember what she ate for breakfast that morning. Her hands took their usual place on the small desktop in the communication room, supporting her as she stood. Another meaningless conversation with the Illusive Man was enough to put her on edge even more than the standard.

There was a slow hiss as the mechanical doors opened up beside her, and she looked up as Jacob walked into the room.

"Commander, we've done what we could for Garrus, but he took a bad hit..."

–---

Shepard remembered the first time she met Garrus. Right before her meeting with the council, the turian had been fighting with a higher-up about taking more time for looking into Saren's case.

"Commander Shepard, Garrus Vakarian. I was the officer in charge of the C-Sec investigation into Saren." He then went on to say how he had a feeling in his gut that something was going on with the rogue spectre, and Shepard could tell he was legitimate in his fears. A rogue spectre meant bad news for the Citadel, especially with the fact that everything he did was classified.

Later on, as they met again with Dr. Michel, Shepard knew he liked to take risks, especially with people's lives. Making that shot at Fist's henchman took a certain amount of confidence, and to be cocky about it later on said a lot about the turian under the armor. But regardless, she still found him as an asset, understanding what he was after, and accepted him as part of her team.

It was probably one of the best decisions of her life.

Mission after mission, Garrus began to prove himself to Shepard. He knew how to use a weapon, and he knew how to aim exactly for the head even better. After a little while, it was common knowledge that whenever Shepard went off the ship, Garrus would usually follow suit.

However, despite the turian always being there for the commander tactically, it was also common knowledge Kaidan Alenko was there for her romantically. It was the subtle hints that gave them away... his hand on her back, the look of relief she gave him when she re-boarded the ship after an unusually difficult mission, the elevator rides that took just a little bit longer than others. The two did their best to be professional about it, but sometimes their passion got the best of them.

Shepard never really knew that happened with her and Alenko in the end. She knew the love was there... at least on his part. She tried to tell herself that Alenko was it for her, that he was everything she wanted in a man: passionate, loving, and caring. But in the very back of her mind, she felt a disconnect there. Like how he had a judging eye whenever she did something he disagreed with, or never quite listened whenever she needed to tell him something important.

Garrus was always there for her, through the thick and thin, always listening, never judging. Whether it was to shoot geth who got too close to her, or to hear her spout off about Saren's evil activity at random hours of the night.

One particular incident, right after speaking to her mother regarding Zabaleta's post-traumatic stress disorder, Shepard had brushed past Alenko, too tired to be Commander Shepard. She took the elevator down to the engineering level, and after looking around to make sure no one was there, she crumpled up behind the Mako, crying quietly. Garrus had found her a while later and without any words, simply sat beside her and took her into his arms.

Before that moment, she has never had anyone do that for her before. Just let her be Jane for a few minutes without asking questions, without telling her to suck it up, without judgment. After that, the friendship of Garrus and Shepard was impenetrable.

He started following her around when she made her rounds to talk to everyone, sometimes becoming as much as a part of the conversation as she was. Other times, like with Kaidan, he just sat back and ate some turian food at a mess hall table as she talked with her beau. After a while, Kaidan noticed that he conversations were getting shorter and shorter, sometimes Shepard avoiding him all together.

The crew became aware of the fact that she would go down to the engineering deck several times a day, each visit beginning to last longer than the one previously. They also began to observe Shepard having, if you will, a slight bounce in her step. Before, she had always been very by the book: walking, talking, acting like a Commander. Now she always had a small twinkle in her eye, her voice becoming a lot more human rather than an Alliance robot. Unfortunately, the Council also began to notice this change in her but didn't mention it, instead pinning the change on other things.

Shepard and Garrus's exchanges had a little bit of everything, with nothing ever being reserved. They could talk about anything ranging from their childhoods to the evils of Saren to what they had for dinner that night. Shepard knew Garrus had her back, and she made sure that Garrus knew that he had the same benefit.

Her favorite conversations were when he talked about himself and all the funny little problems he used to get himself into. One story had to do with him getting in a line in front of a very frustrated krogan. Needless to say, the genophage had gotten brought up sooner rather than later, and the turian had left the building with a very nasty bruise on his right cheek, among other unseen things.

It was the small things that truly made their friendship what it was.

Whenever Garrus went on to the Citadel, he brought back Shepard's favorite food, which just happened to be macaroni and cheese, with a tiny amount of ketchup on the side. The turian found it to be vile smelling when the mess hall worker had cooked it up the first time, and even the humans raised their eyebrows a little with the ketchup. But it was the Commander's favorite food and that was what mattered the most.

Shepard supposed she loved Garrus, but in a different way from Kaidan. Kaidan was always so fast and passionate, and when they talked, the air felt electrified. No one could deny the chemistry they seemed to have, at least in the beginning. Garrus was slow and thoughtful, always making sure Jane was happy and comfortable wherever she was. She didn't think Kaidan gave a shit about what she really thought or how she really felt.

Garrus was her best friend first, and her possible lover second. Their conversations never reached any true level of where they really explored their feelings for each other, but they both knew something was always there, even if gone unmentioned.

She never forgot the last discussion they had before leaving to fight Saren.

It took place down by the Mako like usual, but this time, the room was eerily empty, save the human and turian. The Commander figured everyone was saying their last goodbyes, knowing this very well might be the end.

"Shepard," Garrus had taken a deep breath, his mandibles twitching slightly, "I have something to tell you..." His eyes bore into hers, and she was pretty sure he could look into her soul just then.

"Sure, Garrus, anything." She said, nervous at the serious turn the conversation had taken.

"I... I..." he shook his head, "sorry, this is a bit nerve wracking."

Shepard had just laughed, "Garrus, it's okay. You can tell me anything. There's nothing to be scared about."

"I..." he began to laugh, "I have no idea how to say this to you." He paused for a while, his eyes looking up towards the ceiling.

Shepard could tell he was in deep though, but she had never seen him speechless before.

"I suppose you were a truth I would rather lose, than to have never lain beside at all." He said quietly. "You know I'd do anything for you, right?"

Jane's eyes teared up, and she berated herself for being so emotional. "Of course, Garrus. You're my best friend." She reached out to hug him, feeling the rough skin of his neck against her forehead. Her hands could barely reach around his cold metal armor, but she didn't even care. Taking in a deep breath, she smelled his scent, catching whiffs of must and the engine room, with the tiniest hint of that turian good – the purple goop – he was always eating in the mess hall. She smiled into his chest plate as the turian tried to figure out what to do; he probably didn't even know what a hug was.

His arms closed around her small body and for that moment in time, Jane Shepard had never felt so complete.

–---

"The doc's corrected him with surgical procedures and some cybernetics. Best we can tell, he'll have full functionality but-" Jacob got cut off by the hiss of the mechanical doors opening again.

"Shepard."

She looked up and there he was, strolling into the room, not taking his eyes off her for a single second. Shepard surveyed the damage of the poor turian, her face showing the remorse she felt towards him. His armor had been cracked in several places, parts of it even missing near his face. His face. She felt the most remorse at that. A giant scar had taken place of his left cheek, reaching up from his eye down to his mandible. She could tell he was in pain, but the connection was still in their eyes, their gaze unbreaking.

"Tough son of a bitch," Jacob stated, "Didn't think he'd be up yet."

Jane just simply smiled at the turian, who instantly returned it back.

_Fin _

A/N: I hope you all liked it! I haven't written fanfic in quite a few years, and this is my first Mass Effect story. As always, constructive criticism is appreciated, but please no flamers. Also, reviews = love. Even one word reviews, like "oranges!" or something, I don't care. :)


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